Relationships and Their Boundaries... 

Isn’t it interesting when you read all this stuff about what to accept in a relationship. How to put yourself first, boundaries and so on. 
 
However, no one really knows what goes on in a relationship. If someone perceives someone else as being badly treated or putting up with behaviour that they would not deal with, what right do they actually have to judge? 
 
If you are in a relationship with someone who is suffering from depression for example, are ‘the rules’ the same?  
Do you still put your needs first or the other person? 
 
Whether or not you are ‘married’ if you have chosen and dedicated yourself to that person in your heart then the commitment is the same. 
If you love someone, it is not wrong to accept their behaviour if they are not well. They do not want to behave in that way any more than you wish to be treated thus. However, will it help them more to be loving and supportive or to give up on them and leave them like everyone else has? 
 
Ok, now I’m not for one moment advocating being a doormat or putting up with any form of domestic abuse ever. 
But dealing with a mental illness like depression is completely different. Yes, it can be challenging and draining and a downright complete pain in the arse sometimes. But if you truly love that person in your heart you want to be there for them. 
 
So guys, if you see someone struggling with a relationship with someone who is depressed, don’t tell them ‘I wouldn’t put up with that shit’ etc etc, instead, be kind. You might not understand the reasons why they love that person, but they do... 
 
So instead, give them strength and love and support. An unjudging ear to listen to rants and don’t bring things up that were said in a safe space in the future. 
 
It is not for anyone outside to judge another person's life, after all, we are not walking in their shoes... 
Tagged as: Celtic Musings
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